Monday, April 11, 2011

On Marriage and Toilet Paper

Have you and your husband ever argued about which way to hang the toilet paper off the toilet paper roll?
(Honestly I don't often have this particular argument because my dear husband seems to be toilet-paper-back-on-the-roll challenged, I am the only one so far in this family that has the special gift of putting the toilet paper back on the roll.
He could care less if it was on the roll, off the roll, over or under the roll. )
But, I've heard from several wives/mothers who do have this silly little argument on whether the toilet paper should hang under..

...or over the roll. (Yes, I folded it all nice and neat for the picture. I used to work in a Bed and Breakfast before getting married and that was a must. Now I'm just happy to even HAVE toilet paper in the bathroom when the time comes to use it).
I'm going to wade in on this great controversy and state that toilet paper should be put on the roll so you have to pull it from under. At least, At least, while there are small impressionable and easily amused little people in the house.

Here is why:
Does anyone else have this problem on a fairly regular basis?
With 5 small, testosterone filled little bodies running around the house ages 4 and under, there is not a day that goes by when something is not pulled off, dumped out, jumped on, or in this case rolled off of whatever it should be left on.
If the toilet paper is loaded to roll from the top, then this is far more likely to happen.
Curious George Syndrome hits and they gleefully watch the pile spin to the floor.
I've even found them wrapped in the roll of toilet paper.
If it's rolled coming from the bottom, I can usually hear them trying to figure it out with the rapid slapping and spinning and giggling that turns into frustrated screams.
It only takes seconds.

Then to add insult to injury, this particular day they thought it would be fun to throw the above pile into the tub and turn on the water.
Hmmmmm......let's see if that fits down the pipes.
One of the above children shoved an ENTIRE roll of toilet paper down the toilet bowl just last week.
It's Mr. Ivory in the above picture (just so you don't panic and think I'm telling on someone else's child).
Yes, this is just a week or so after we'd already called the plumber from his older brother's great adventure that he talked his little friend into going along with.
That said toilet is now duct-taped shut and the handle duct taped until we can again afford to call our beloved plumber friend.
I will continue loading our toilet paper roll so that it comes out the bottom. (No pun intended).
In this case, it saves my sanity and therefore, my marriage.

1 comment:

Heather said...

I totally agree with you about the direction of the roll when you have toddlers in the house. It really does affect their temptation level. One trick I learned with one of mine was to squeeze the roll before putting it on so that it slows their ability to unroll it - making it a little less fun. I pull out that trick whenever he/she gets in an unrolling kick.